So it is now the end of May (May 20th). How crazy is that! I just finished my third week of field placement and am loving it for the most part. I've been staying on top of things and am in bed every night by 9 - 10pm.
Let's see what have you missed, hmm.....
Well I finished my exams and passed them all except for this one which I am almost done and am certain this time that I will.
Since field placement (that's what the course I am taking is called) has started I have talked to boy 3 times now or maybe it was only twice. Once was the Monday I think it was of my 2nd week he had texted Miss you and then said going back to bed which wasnt really romantic if you ask me (like sweet) it was kind of like aww thanks ? I told him I would text him on my break and did. I told him that I missed him too and I only ignored him because he wasn't texting me back. I gave up on texting him if he wasn't going to respond. I didn't hear back from him so I said whatever. If he wants to talk to me he can find a way and he should know by now that if he isn't hearing back from me that means I texted but he never got it. He can call me or message me or something. I really do hope things happen between us, and if not I'll be bummed but hey what are you going to do, shit happens at least I say I tried but if nothing doesnt then what else is I let him be my first kiss and he knows that and he took that away and what did I get nothing.
I did however get a weakness. I was downtown for my friends birthday and I was by myself sitting down, I think about him all the time and I texted him hi but never heard from him so I wonder if he didn't get the text. I hope he didn't because I need to be stronger then that. When my 5 weeks are done I'm going to message him because this way I know he'll get it like there's no way he can say I never got it and be like
"I'm done field placement but I don't want to be done with you. I don't want us to barely talk but instead I want it to go back to like December where we would all the time and I understand that your busy and I'm busy and there's a slim chance that we can do that but I'm sure there is a chance we can still talk. I don't want to keep doing this, I get a text from you and it's the best thing ever and I'll text you back and you don't respond and if your not getting it then find another way to talk back to me. I miss texting you every morning when I get up, I miss talking to you I miss your pokes and your hugs :( Now that I am done and can finally start my summer I need to know what is happening to us. If you have no intention of seeing me and where things can go then just let me go now so I can move on. You said you will tell me that if you don't want to hang with me or talk to me then you'll say that but the thing is I never hear from you. This is not what I thought things would come between us and it has.
It's going to go a little something like that and he will be going to my school in September which I love but I wont if he doesn't talk to me and if something does happen between us and he does come to my school, I'll feel like the luckiest girl in the world. <3
This is probably super long just like my first ones but that's because I haven't typed on this in forever! It hasn't been a priority but now that this is coming to an end and summer vacation is starting I'm sure there will be more to come. Anyways I'm going to bed now. It's 930 and I'm exhausted.
Oh and apparently the world is suppose to die tomorrow. I don't believe that but there is always this paranoia . I might die a virgin but at least I can say that I've been kissed lol. Apparently god is choosing those he wants to go to heaven and then the rest he will torture till October.
So I guess we will see. It's also my nieces birthday tomorrow, the one who will be 15. Ya the one I don't see anymore. Ya that one. Joy -_- But I'm going to email her.
Anyways peace I'm going to sleep for sure this time I'm not just saying it.
- A-
